Broken Hallelujah

Everyone knows the Leonard Cohen song "Hallelujah". If you don't, get out from under that rock and educate yourself. People speculate and hypothesize all sorts of meanings and interpretations of what that song is actually about. But, that's the wonderful thing about art. Every single person can find what it means to them, regardless of the artist's intenEveryone knows the Leonard Cohen song "Hallelujah". If you don't, get out from under that rock and educate yourself. People speculate and hypothesize all sorts of meanings and interpretations of what that song is actually about. But, that's the wonderful thing about art. Every single person can find what it means to them, regardless of the artist's intentionstions.

It happens to be one of my favorite songs. I could go into intellectual annotations and discuss the biblical references and metaphors because I'm a big nerd and love all that. But I think the real reason that song remains one of my favorites is due to one line. "And love is not a victory march, it's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah" That line perfectly describes something profound to me. Deciding to love, to have faith, to press on in our darkest moments is crucial. It's choosing vulnerability. It's choosing love. 

I painted "Broken Hallelujah" at a time of defeat. It was just after the election and looking around at my family, my friends, my neighbors, and country feeling lost. Seeing so much hate made me feel as though I'd woken up in a different world. I was also pregnant and didn't know it yet. Waiting for those two pink lines can often make you feel defeated and broken. I felt that the world, that I, needed art more than ever.

So, I decided to do something scary. I painted live. This wasn't intended to be a political statement, but a statement of love and vulnerability. So many times I start painting, hate it, and leave it for a few days. Choosing to do this live felt like a humongous risk for me. What if it sucked? What if I hate it? But I felt like the world needed me, that I needed to for myself, to look around and choose "hallelujah".

You can watch a time lapse video of my live painting can make "Broken Hallelujah" part of your collection here.